"Latibulate" by Kasie Hayes

Latibulate means "to hide oneself in the corner" or "the intense urge to retreat." With all that life has thrown my way, I feel that this word perfectly captures how I feel most days. I used to be loud (I still am at times depending on the environment). I used to be bold, or that's what I thought it was called. Now, most days you can find me internally running from the world - desiring to retreat into my creative bubble to explore the depths of silence. Motherhood and COVID revealed in me an introversion that I always knew existed, but never fully embraced. I have lived my life mostly for other people. Showing up for others when I am maxed out, lifting others up when I feel down - carrying loads that I was never meant to carry. This season of my life is marked by a deep urge to unapologetically latibulate and refuel; to unlearn and to learn; to rediscover and to discover; to refuse to show up in spaces pre-determined ways merely because it's what is expected of me.

This piece is in process and is hand-drawn in Photoshop using an XP-Pen digital drawing tablet.